YOOOO WHY WON’T YOU LET ME BE GREAT!!!   I HAD THE TWO GREATEST DAYS OF MY LIFE AND WHEN I GET BACK FROM THE LOUIE SHOW I READ SOME SHIT CLAIMING I SAID I’M DOWN TO DO PORN AND SOME BISEXUAL PORN!!!!   I CAN’T BELIEVE THE AVN WOULD POST      FIRST PEOPLE BELIEVED THE TWITTER/STEVEN COLBERT THING, ROLLING STONE EVEN PRINTED IT!!!!   NOW SOMEBODY HAS BEEN HACKING INTO MY MYSPACE AND SOMEBODY’S ACTUALLY  HACKED INTO MY PERSONAL GMAIL ACCOUNT AND HAS BEEN EMAILING PEOPLE FROM IT… HEY WORLD I NO LONGER HAVE A GMAIL!     I FOUND OUT I HAD TWELVE UNAUTHORIZED SKYPE ACCOUNTS UNDER MY NAME!!!  THIS ALL IN THE PAST FOUR DAYS.  WELCOME TO KANYE WEST WORLD!  ….   IT’S NOT OFFICIAL.     I JUST GAVE  THE PERFORMANCE OF MY LIFETIME FOR OUR NEW PRESIDENT … THEN I FLEW TO PARIS AND THEY DEBUTED MY NEW SHOES THAT I DESIGNED WITH LOUIE VUITTON WHICH WAS A DREAM COME TRUE.     PLEASE I BEG YOU, GIVE ME A BREAK!!!!! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   LET ME BE GREAT!!!    WHO HAVE I HURT SO BAD THAT THEY WANT TO DESTROY ME?   WHO HAVE I EVER SPOKE ABOUT SO NEGATIVELY?  I JUST WAS SPEAKING WITH OUR NEW PRESIDENT TWO DAYS AGO… AND NOW THIS….  SIDEBAR… NEVER TAKE A PICTURE FROM MY OBAMA PERFORMANCE AND PUT IT NEXT TO A BS QUOTE LIKE THAT!  THAT’S IN POOR TASTE!  THAT UNDERMINES WHAT MY CONTRIBUTION TO THAT EVENT WAS AND SLAPS EVERYBODY WHO FELT UPLIFTED BY THAT PERFORMANCE IN THE FACE!   A PICTURE SAYS A THOUSAND WORDS…  LOOK HOW FRESH MY SUIT IS… NUFF SAID!

I guess kanYe needs to come up with a stronger password and maybe some security questions that have answers the public doesn’t know.

In more plain English terms this what people would say, I stole if from a friend and I am pretty sure he won’t mind me using it:

MySpace User: Hey man, check out these sweet shoes I just bought!
Facebook User: I just bought some shoes from the mall.
Twitter User: I’m at the mall buying shoes.
LinkedIn User: I own a shoe store, you should come work for me.